Foley issue: what's age-appropriate?

I think youth oriented culture pervades the gay male sphere just like it does the straights. And despite subtle differences, I think gay and straight men will always like youthful looking men and women -- by this I don't mean teenagers, but young adults in their 20s or 30s. Whether they will be successful in obtaining them is a question to ponder, but I want to highlight the many parallels and differences between gays and straights on this topic.

Similarities

The gay male counterpart to the material girl/trophy wife is the young 'boy toy', and just like female prostitutes there are rent boys, who engage in sex acts for money. Just like prostitutes need to be attractive younger women, these need to be attractive young men. I say this to highlight what men of either gay or straight orientation are willing to pay for, what they find valuable -- and it is youthfulness.

There is some biological process also which seems to age the people one finds desirable. I mean I used to like teenage boys -- but that was when I was a teenager myself. But now I don't take to them. I remember as a teenager liking the relatively older Michael J. Fox and Tom Cruise for a time. Now that I'm in my 30's, my eye can still be caught by a 20-something year old. And I could be wrong, but extrapolating that trend, I don't think I will find 60 year old fat, balding guys desirable when I turn 60 myself. I'll still always like men in their 20s or 30s.

I think what hits both gay and straight males might be practicality. Unless you have money and status to be a sugar daddy, what would drive a younger women to engage with an older man? But this practicality probably hits older gay males even harder. Males are even more attracted to appearance than women (who have supposedly a greater weakness for high status males), so an older gay man would have to be extremely rich and probably also reasonably good looking to get the attentions of a younger gay man.

A person's emotional maturity might have a impact on desirability of that person to a rational gay or straight man, and this is where older might be better. Anyway, I think it makes sense, but I kind of doubt how many men can be completely rational when it comes to attraction?

Differences

There does seem to be less of an outcry about sexual abuse of boys compared to girls. There is the somewhat sexist idea that boys can fend for themselves. The idea is that boys are naturally tougher, and they might not allow unwanted sexual behavior towards them. Whenever you hear about a female teacher having sex with underage male students, it's mostly the end of a joke on the Tonight show. It's just not a big deal -- it seems the boy must have enjoyed it and wanted it the reasoning goes. [NYTimes article on this shows that psychologists believe it will seriously warp the kid.] Of course, this doesn't really apply to gay male pedophila since there's still the idea of penetration or other things distasteful to straights. And while there's no physical equivalent of victim losing his virginity, it's still perhaps rightly considered something like rape. Note: in the Foley case we aren't talking about even a physical meeting, but definitely harassment.

Gay males even today largely live without the counter-balance of marriage and children, despite a large number, maybe even a majority of gays and lesbians wanting a marriage option. My honest opinion is that straight society helps cultivate "age-appropriate" desire in older men. Older men naturally feel desire for protection of their own daughters and adjust their stated opinion of what is desirable to them to an age older than their daughters. Gay men don't have this pressure unless they have adopted children or children from a previous straight marriage.

But then there is the closet. This might be the unique downfall for old gay and possibly Republican males. Unable to acknowledge their true sexual feelings, an old gay male in the closet sneaks around trying to satisfy their needs and the easiest prey is the vulnerable and naive interns and pages.

Conclusions

So... an older gay male finds youth and youthful appearance attractive, just like his straight counterpart, is less restrained by the conventions of marriage and children to develop his desires for older men, but still is restrained by practicality and potential accusations of pedophilia and harassment.

But the further gay challenge of the closet appears to be creating males so desperate for sexual contact that they are willing to sacrifice their careers for some young intern or page.